Showing posts with label Hilarious Facebook Status. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hilarious Facebook Status. Show all posts

Status99 | Facebook Status | Whatsapp Status

Facebook is a great way to connect with family and friends living of much of palaces. Our Facebook status aid to show up appealing so, make your Facebook Condition various from the others. You could Discussing the sensations can minimize the worry of heart, share Facebook Status to permit your close friends know about your sensation. Make Your Facebook status Pals Smile By Discussing Hilarious Facebook Status. Obtain the quotes on examinations for facebook and share it on the wall of class friends to want them for examinations in an extremely charming way.


I wish I had google in my mind and antivirus in my heart.
I just saved lot of money by lic life insurance ……..By not having any.
Love marriage is like dancing in front of snake and asking him to bite.
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
Waiting for wi-fi network.
Jidhar apna CRUSH hai , udhar hich sala RUSH hai and filhaal timepass k liye only CANDYCRUSH he…(hindi)
Always remember you are UNIQUE………… just like everybody else. 
For more Best  Facebook Status

Second chances are for losers….either we do it in first place or live it for others.
I wish I could loose weight as easy as I lose my pens,keys,smartphone,my temper and even my mind.
fun is like life insurance.The older you get..the more it cost’s.
I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by selling my car.
My week is basically …Monday–>Monday#2–>Monday#3–>Monday#4–>Friday–>Saturday–>pre-Monday
We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like.
Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to monday????
I like to take road less travelled…..helps me to avoid traffic.
Wow now I’m a graduate…….Now thermometer is not the only thing that has degrees without brains
I can see you checking my whatsapp status. B)
Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad.True story.
I’am looking for a bank loan which can perform two thing
My laziness is like 8, when I lie down it becomes infinity ๐Ÿ˜€ :p
CGPA available for adoption… can’t raise it myself.
Contributing to entropy since 1994.
One person’s LOL is another’s WTF!
Darr k aage jeet hai….aur dadar k aage seat hai (Just for mumbaikars)
I will be back before you pronunce afjkhnfkualnfhukcakecnhkj.
Dream as if you’ll live forever..Live as if tomorrow is last one.
Galileo:Great mind…Einstein:genius mind…Newton:Extraordinary mind….Bill gates:brilliant mind…..ME:Never Mind.

People r like music some say the truth and rest,just noise.
Just wanted to say, you are as useless as “ueue” in a “queue”.
Sleep till you’re hungry….Eat till you’re sleepy.

The only difference between a good day and a bad day is your attitude.

Tried to loose weight…….But it keeps finding me.
If you try to pronounce “lmao” you sound like a french cat.

formula for success…….under promise and over deliver…….
SI unit of ignorance = “seen”
lazy People Fact #5812672793
You were too lazy to read that number.
s..give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

Hindi Facebook Love Status | Hindi Shayari | Whatsapp | Facebook

Love is a Good feelings between boy and girl and now a day these feelings converted in Facebook love status, Love status messages, Hindi love status, sad status, Love status in hindi quote. If you want to share your feelings with your lover through Facebook then facebookstatus99.com might be helpfull for you. Because We have a good Collection of Facebook status in hindi. We Have The Best Collections of Hindi Facebook Status Status99 Facebook shayari.



Facebook-whatsapp-love Status


เคตเค•़्เคค เคจूเคฐ เค•ो เคฌเคนเคจूเคฐ เค•เคฐ เคฆेเคคा เคนै
เคฅोเคก़े เคธे เคœเค–เคฎ เค•ो เคจाเคธूเคฐ เค•เคฐ เคฆेเคคा เคนै
เคตเคฐเคจा เค•ोเคจ เคšाเคนเคคा เคนै เคคुเคฎ เคœेเคธे เคฆोเคธ्เคคो เคธे เคฆूเคฐ เคฐเคนเคจा
เคตเค•़्เคค เคนी เคคो เค‡ंเคธाเคจ เค•ो เคฎเคœเคฌूเคฐ เค•เคฐ เคฆेเคคा


เคŸूเคŸे เคนुเค เคช्เคฏाเคฒे เคฎें เคœाเคฎ เคจเคนीं เค†เคคा
เค‡เคถ्เค•़ เคฎें เคฎเคฐीเคœ เค•ो เค†เคฐाเคฎ เคจเคนीं เค†เคคा
เคฏे เคฌेเคตเคซा เคฆिเคฒ เคคोเคก़เคจे เคธे เคชเคนเคฒे เคฏे เคธोเคš เคคो เคฒिเคฏा เคนोเคคा
เค•े เคŸुเคŸा เคนुเค† เคฆिเคฒ เค•िเคธी เค•े เค•ाเคฎ เคจเคนीं เค†เคคा ……..


เคฒोเค— เคฐूเคช เคฆेเค–เคคे เคนै ,เคนเคฎ เคฆिเคฒ เคฆेเค–เคคे เคนै ,
เคฒोเค— เคธเคชเคจे เคฆेเค–เคคे เคนै เคนเคฎ เคนเค•़ीเค•เคค เคฆेเค–เคคे เคนै,

เคฒोเค— เคฆुเคจिเคฏा เคฎे เคฆोเคธ्เคค เคฆेเค–เคคे เคนै,
เคนเคฎ เคฆोเคธ्เคคो เคฎे เคฆुเคจिเคฏा เคฆेเค–เคคे เคนै.


เค•เคฐो เค•ुเค› เคเคธा เคฆोเคธ्เคคी เคฎें
เค•ी ‘Thanks & Sorry’ words เคฌे-เคˆเคฎाเคจ เคฒเค—े
เคจिเคญाเค“ เคฏाเคฐी เคเคธे เค•े ‘เคฏाเคฐ เค•ो เค›ोเคก़เคจा เคฎुเคถ्เค•िเคฒ’
เค”เคฐ เคฆुเคจिเคฏा เค›ोเคก़เคจा เค†เคธाเคจ เคฒเค—े


เคตो เคฌेเคตเคซा เคนเคฎाเคฐा เค‡เคฎ्เคคेเคนा เค•्เคฏा เคฒेเค—ी…
เคฎिเคฒेเค—ी เคจเคœ़เคฐो เคธे เคจเคœ़เคฐे เคคो เค…เคชเคจी เคจเคœ़เคฐे เคœ़ुเค•ा เคฒेเค—ी…
เค‰เคธे เคฎेเคฐी เค•เคฌเคฐ เคชเคฐ เคฆीเคฏा เคฎเคค เคœเคฒाเคจे เคฆेเคจा…
เคตो เคจाเคฆाเคจ เคนै เคฏाเคฐो… เค…เคชเคจा เคนाเคฅ เคœเคฒा เคฒेเค—ी.


เค†เคœ़ाเคฆ เคนैं เคคोเคน เค†เคธเคฎाเคจ เค›ु เคนी เค†เคंเค—े
เคœ़िंเคฆा เคนै เคคो เคนเคฐ เคœंเค— เคœीเคค เคœाเคฏेंเค—े
เคธाเคฅ เคนैं เคนเคฎ เคคो เคฆुเคจिเคฏा เค•ो เคฆिเค–ा เค†เคंเค—े
เคคिเคฐंเค—े เค•े เคคीเคจ เคฐंเค—ों เคฎें เคฆेเคถ เค•ो เคธเคฎा เคœाเคฏेंเค—े


เคฎเคนोเคฌ्เคฌเคค เค•ी เคถเคฎ्เคฎा เคœเคฒा เค•เคฐ เคคो เคฆेเค–ो,
เคœเคฐा เคฆिเคฒ เค•ी เคฆुเคจिเคฏाँ เคธเคœा เค•เคฐ เคคो เคฆेเค–ो,
เคคुเคฎ्เคนे เคนो เคจा เคœाเค เคฎเคนोเคฌ्เคฌเคค เคคो เค•เคนเคจा,
เคœเคฐा เคนเคฎเคธे เคจเคœเคฐें เคฎिเคฒाเค•เคฐ เคคो เคฆेเค–ो... 


เคนเคฐ เคตเค•्เคค เค—ुเคฒ เคฌเคจเค•เคฐ เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเคจा เคœिเคจ्เคฆเค—ी เคนै,
เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเค•เคฐ เค—เคฎ เคญुเคฒाเคจा เคœिเคจ्เคฆเค—ी เคนै,
เคœीเคค เค•เคฐ เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเค เคคो เค•्เคฏा เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเค,
เคนाเคฐ เค•เคฐ เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเคจा เคœिเคจ्เคฆเค—ी เคนै....


เคฆुเคจिเคฏा เคฎें เคˆเคฎाเคจ เคจเคนीं เคนै
เคซिเคฐ เคญी เคคू เคนैเคฐाเคจ เคจเคนीं เคนै..
เคคू เคœो เคฌेเคˆเคฎाเคจ เคจเคนीं เคนै
เค•ोเคˆ เคฌेเคˆเคฎाเคจ เคจเคนीं เคนै..
เคคुเคฎเค•ो เคฎैं เคชเคนเคšाเคจ เคฐเคนा เคนूँ
เคคुเคฎเคธे เคฌเคธ เคชเคนเคšाเคจ เคจเคนीं เคนै.. ...



เคธुเคฌเคน เค•ा เคนเคฐ เคชเคฒ เคœ़िंเคฆเค—ी เคฆे เค†เคชเค•ो
เคฆिเคจ เค•ा เคนเคฐ เคฒเคฎ्เคนा เค–ुเคถी เคฆे เค†เคชเค•ो
เคœเคนा เค—เคฎ เค•ी เคนเคตा เค›ू เค•เคฐ เคญी เคจ เค—ुเคœ़เคฐे
เค–ुเคฆा เคตो เคœเคจ्เคจเคค เคธे เคœ़เคฎीเคจ เคฆे เค†เคชเค•ो... ...



เคฏे เคฌेเคตเคซा เคตเคซा เค•ी เค•ीเคฎเคค เค•्เคฏा เคœाเคจे !!
เคนै เคฌेเคตเคซा เค—เคฎ-เค เคฎोเคนเคฌ्เคฌเคค เค•्เคฏा เคœाเคจे !!
เคœिเคจ्เคนे เคฎिเคฒเคคा เคนै เคนเคฐ เคฎोเคก เคชเคฐ เคจเคฏा เคนเคฎเคธเคซเคฐ !!
เคตो เคญเคฒा เคช्เคฏाเคฐ เค•ी เค•ीเคฎเคค เค•्เคฏा เคœाเคจे !! ...



Na hum rhe dil lagane kabil,
Na dil rha gam uthane kabil,
Lage uski yaado ke jo zakham dil par,
Na chhoda usne muskurane ke kabil..!


Kabhi hum pe wo jan diya karte the,
Jo hum kehte the wo maan liya karte the,
Aaj pas se anjaan banke guzar gaye,
Jo dur se hume pehchan liya kerte the..!!


Kitaabo me kehte hai phool todna mana hai
Baagon me kehte hai phool todna mana hai
Phoolon se keemti cheez hain dil
Koyi nahi kehta ki dil todna mana hain…..!!



Facebook-whatsapp-love Status


Mohabbat ki daastan sunane aaye hain,
Tabaah krne k bad wo pyar jatane aye hai
Aansu pochh liye the hamnein kab ke
Magar wo fir se aaj hume rulane aaye hai.


Kash woh samjhte is dil ki tadap ko
To yun humein ruswa na kiya hota
Unki ye berukhi bhi manzoor thi hme
Bas ek baar humein samjh liya hota..!


Meri zindagi mujhe yeh bata,
Mujhe bhul kr tujhe kya mila.?
Meri hasrato ka hisaab de,
Dil tor kar tujhe kya mila….?
Tere chaar din ke pyaar se,
Mujhe umar bhar ka gum mila
Main toot kar bikhar gaya,
Mujhe tor kr tujhe kya mila..??


Takleef to zindagi deti hai maut ko to log yuhi badnaam karte hai!!


tum kisi or se LOVE kar lo hame sudharne mai Time lagega... :-P


Hamne chor diya shoq-a-mohabat ka...varna tere shar ki khidkiyan to aaj bhi isare karti hai.


Sher mai hu mai tere..aake mujhe dhek to le.


ye sala pyar ho gya ki UPSC ka exam ho gya pass hi ho rha.


Babuji Exam se dar nahi lagta..slow internet se lagta hai.


per mai moch and slow internet connection aadmi ko kbhi aage badne nahi dete.


aql badam khane se nahi thokar khane se aati hai.


Yaaro Ki Mehfil Aise Jamai Jati Hai, Kholne Se Pehle Botal Hilai Jati Hai.


Fiqr kar uski jo teri fiqr kre, u to zindgi mai bhut hai hamdard.


Prem ek aisi agni jisme padne wala to anand leta hai
aur dekhna wala jalta hai.


Tera na hone se zindagi mein bus itni si kami rehti hai,
main chahein lakh muskuraun in aankhon mein nami si rehti hai.


Qayamat toot padti hai zara se hoth hilne par
na jaane kya hashr hoga agar vo muskuraye to..


Sab bhool jata hu aapke siva, ye kya mujhe hua h

Kya isi ehsaas ko duniya ne pyar ka naam dia hain.


Aapko jo dekha hmne, mano zindagi mil gayi hai
Aapka pyar paya humne, mano jannat mil gayi hai..


Ache nishane baz ho tum thik nishane pe tune teer mara
Duniya se hr baaji jitne wala, aaj tumse apna dil hara.


Wo ‘mili bhi to sirf khuda ke darbaar mein,
Ab tum hi batao yaaron hum ‘ibaadat karte ya mohabbat’.


Mausam ki khushgawari ka ek hi ishara hai,
Yaadein hain jiski woh yaar humara hain….


เคตो เคฌเคก़े เคคाเคœ्เคœुเคฌ เคธे เคชूเค› เคฌैเค ा เคฎेเคฐे เค—เคฎ เค•ी เคตเคœเคน..
เคซिเคฐ เคนเคฒ्เค•ा เคธा เคฎुเคธ्เค•เคฐाเคฏा, เค”เคฐ เค•เคนा, เคฎोเคนเคฌ्เคฌเคค เค•ी เคฅी เคจा… ??


Kuch isliye b mene use jaane se nhi roka,
Kyu ki jata hi kyu agar mera hota……!!!!!


เคงเคกเค•เคจों เค•ो เค•ुเค› เคคो เค•ाเคฌू เคฎें เค•เคฐ เค เคฆिเคฒ
เค…เคญी เคคो เคชเคฒเค•ें เคुเค•ाเคˆ เคนै เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเคจा เค…เคญी เคฌाเค•ी เคนै เค‰เคจเค•ा.


My real smile comes when i am with you.


Log kehte hai ki mohabbat ek bar hoti hain,
Lekin me jb jb use dekhu mujhe hr bar hoti h..


เคคुเคे เค•ोเคˆ เค”เคฐ เคญी เคšाเคนे,
เค‡เคธ เคฌाเคค เคธे เคฆिเคฒ เคฅोเคกा เคฅोเคกा เคœเคฒเคคा เคนै,
เคชเคฐ เคซเค–เคฐ เคนै เคฎुเคे เค‡เคธ เคฌाเคค เคชे เค•ि,
เคนเคฐ เค•ोเคˆ เคฎेเคฐी เคชเคธंเคฆ เคชे เคนी เคฎเคฐเคคा เคนै l


Tu MoHabbAt Hai MerI Isi LiYe DooR Hai Mujhse
AgaR JiDd HotI Toh SaaM TaKK BaaHon Mei Hoti..




Love Facebook Status in Hindi | Sad Status | Love Status |

Love is a Good feelings between boy and girl and now a day these feelings converted in Facebook love status, Love status messages, Hindi love status, sad status, Love status in hindi quote. If you want to share your feelings with your lover through Facebook then facebookstatus99.com might be helpfull for you. Because We have a good Collection of status in hindi.

Love_Facebook_Status

1) Jiski sazaa sirf tum ho,
Mujhe aisa koi gunaah karna hain…..!!

2) Someone asked me, How’s life….?
I just smiled and replied, She’s fine.

3) เคงเคกเค•เคจों เค•ो เค•ुเค› เคคो เค•ाเคฌू เคฎें เค•เคฐ เค เคฆिเคฒ
เค…เคญी เคคो เคชเคฒเค•ें เคुเค•ाเคˆ เคนै เคฎुเคธ्เค•ुเคฐाเคจा เค…เคญी เคฌाเค•ी เคนै เค‰เคจเค•ा.

4) My real smile comes when i am with you.



5) Log kehte hai ki mohabbat ek bar hoti hain,
Lekin me jb jb use dekhu mujhe hr bar hoti h..

6) Dard dilon ke kam ho jaate…
Main aur Tum agar hum ho jaate…

7) My heart was taken by you, broken by you
And now it’s in pieces because of you….!!!

8) เคตो เคฌเคก़े เคคाเคœ्เคœुเคฌ เคธे เคชूเค› เคฌैเค ा เคฎेเคฐे เค—เคฎ เค•ी เคตเคœเคน..
เคซिเคฐ เคนเคฒ्เค•ा เคธा เคฎुเคธ्เค•เคฐाเคฏा, เค”เคฐ เค•เคนा, เคฎोเคนเคฌ्เคฌเคค เค•ी เคฅी เคจा… ??

9) Sometimes it’s better to be alone,
No one can hurt you that way.

10) Kuch isliye b mene use jaane se nhi roka,
Kyu ki jata hi kyu agar mera hota……!!!!!

11) Suna hain duaon ki keemat nahi hoti,
Fir bhi karobaar khub chalta hain iska

12) Happiness is not ready made,
It comes by our own actions….!!!!

13) เคœिंเคฆเค—ी เคฎेเคฐे เค•ाเคจो เคฎे เค…เคญी เคนोเคฒे เคธे เค•ुเค› เค•เคน เค—เคˆ,
เค‰เคจ เคฐिเคถ्เคคो เค•ो เคธंเคญाเคฒे เคฐเค–เคจा เคœिเคจเค•े เคฌिเคจ เค—ुเคœ़ाเคฐा เคจเคนीं เคนोเคคा

14) To succeed in life, you need two things,
Ignorance and Confidence.

15) Waqt atcha ho to aapki galti bhi mazak lgti hai
Or waqt khrab ho to mazak bhi galti ban jati hain.

16) Rim jhim rim jhim baras rahi hai,
Yaad tumhaari qatraa – qatraa……


17) Mujhe maar hi na dale in badlon ki sazish,
Ye jb se baras rahe hain tum yaad aa rhe ho.


18) Whenever it rains, I feel you.

19) Ye husn-e mosam, ye barish, ye hawayein,
Lgta hai mohabbat ne aaj kisi ka sath diya hai


20) Is barish k mausam me ajeeb si kashish h
Na chahte hue bhi koi shidat se yaad aata hai.


21) Sab bhool jata hu aapke siva, ye kya mujhe hua h
Kya isi ehsaas ko duniya ne pyar ka naam dia hain.

22) Aapko jo dekha hmne, mano zindagi mil gayi hai
Aapka pyar paya humne, mano jannat mil gayi hai..

23) Ache nishane baz ho tum thik nishane pe tune teer mara
Duniya se hr baaji jitne wala, aaj tumse apna dil hara.

24) Wo ‘mili bhi to sirf khuda ke darbaar mein,
Ab tum hi batao yaaron hum ‘ibaadat karte ya mohabbat’.

25) Mausam ki khushgawari ka ek hi ishara hai,
Yaadein hain jiski woh yaar humara hain….

26)  เค–ुเคถ เคนूं เค”เคฐ เคธเคฌเค•ो เค–ुเคถ เคฐเค–เคคा เคนुँ
เคฒाเคชเคฐเคตाเคน เคนुँ เคซिเคฐ เคญी เคธเคฌเค•ी เคชเคฐเคตाเคน
เค•เคฐเคคा เคนुँ
เคฎाเคฒुเคฎ เคนै เค•ोเคˆ เคฎोเคฒ เคจเคนी เคฎेंเคฐा
เคซिเคฐ เคญी เค…เคจเคฎोเคฒ เคฒोเค—ो เคธे เคฐिเคธ्เคคा
เคฐเค–เคคा

27) Dil main tamannao ko dabana seekh liya, 
Gam ko ankhon me chhipana seekh liya
Mere Chahre se kahin koi baat zaahir na ho jaye
Daba ke inn Hoto ko muskurana sikh liya......

28) Kash Humari Bhi Parwah Kisi ne Ki Hoti,
 To Ye Duniya Humse Khafa nahi Hoti,
Agar Aata Aap Jaisa Muskurana Humein
To Humse Bhi Aap Jaise Hi Kisi Shaks
Ne Mohabbat Ki Hoti

29) Yaad Rukti Nahi Rok Paane Se,
Dil Maanta Nahi Kisi Ke Samjhane Se
Ruk Jati Hai Dhadkane Dil ki Aapko Bhul Jane Se
Isliye Aapko Yaad Karte Hai Jeene ke Bagane Se..........):


Cool and Funny Status updates Facebook | What's app

Facebook is the best platform for social interaction between friends and peoples. showing what's your mood on Facebook. Facebook has never been easier with latest status updates and posts. On facebookstatus99.com you can find best collection of best status for facebook, funny statuses for facebook, status updates for facebook every type of facebook statuses and quotes for your post.


  • For you men who think a woman’s place is in the kitchen, remember.. that’s where the knives are kept.
  • Some of my friends are like a slinky – completely useless, but fun to push down stairs.
  • Is On The Toilet (>_<) (o_o) (0_0) ~ (^_^) Ahhhhhhhh That`s Better. 
  • I wake up when I cant hold my pee in any longer.
  • I’m pretty sure the best thing about Facebook is the ability to read other people’s fights. 
  • I’ve been using Google for 10 years and I have no idea who uses the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button.
  • Looking at people’s mutual friends and saying “OMG HOW DO YOU KNOW THEM”
  • LIKE if you have that one friend that Laughs at everything. Even when it’s not funny.
  • “Was that lightning?!” “No, they’re taking pictures for Google earth…”
  • Telling someone that you’re going to bed, When you’re actually not, and then having to hold back from posting things on Facebook.
  • If you don’t do stupid things while you’re young, you’ll have nothing to smile about when you’re old.
  • If they have an Ice Cream Truck for kids, why don’t that have a Beer Truck for adults?
  • That awkward moment when someone *Likes* One of your Very old Facebook statuses and you think “Creeper”.
  • The best feature of the iPhone is the feature that keeps you from getting pushed in the pool.
  • When people go underwater in movies, I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived in that situation.
  • When I order coffee or whatever from starbucks and they ask me for my name I like to look at their name tag and then just say their name and then they’re always like nooo wayyy that’s my name too and then I’m also like noo wayyy and I always expect them to give me something for free because we have the same name but they never do
  • I hate it when I’m singing along to a song and the artist gets the words wrong
  • when a girl says she’ll be ready in 5 more minutes, it’s the same as when a guy says the game has 5 minutes left.:D
  • AATCHOO! …….?(-??~•~)?……. If you`re allergic to bullshit, drama, liars, and 2-faced people, LIKE to keep this sneeze going.
  • My grandma has always told me that if you have nothing good to say then don’t say anything at all, yet people still wonder why I am so quiet (:
  • That depressing moment when you dip your cookie into milk for too long, it breaks off, and you wonder why bad things happen to good people.
  • That awkward moment when you’re trying to ignore a call and accidentally answer it.
  • Never look back. If Cinderella went to pick up her shoe, she would not had become a princess.:D
  • That awesome moment when you got a question wrong on a test but your teacher accidentally marked it correct.
  • If nobody hates you, you are doing something boring.
  • We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police
  • A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known and then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
  • If I opened a camera store called Photo Shop, do you think I’d get sued by Adobe?
  • Somebody slowly drove by my apartment around 3am this morning blasting not rap, not rock, but organ music. I’m pretty sure it was the Phantom of the Opera.
  • Woke up this morning with a HUGE smile on my face… Yes my kids found my Sharpie stash.
  • You know you’re getting old when the guys from the “cialis” commercials are starting to look hot.
  • Women love the winter because they don’t have to shave their legs. I think it’s time for me to shave though…my giraffe tattoo has a mustache!
  • 1. Pour milk on floor. 2. Ask which kid did it. 3. Send them to their rooms when they don’t admit it. 4. Enjoy peaceful evening.
  • Follow your dreams. Unless it’s a person. ..apparently they call THAT stalking.
  • If anyone ever tells you your dreams are silly, remember there’s a millionaire walking around that invented the pool noodle.
  • Wanted to kill the sexiest person alive…But suicide’s a crime.
  • Remembers the day when blackberry and apple were just fruit.
  • One day a chicken crossed the road and met james bond and said whats your name?? ….bond james bond… whats yours??..ken chick ken!
  • Hello everyone. Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like
  • status: I can’t log into facebook
  • Teaching your own mother how to use Facebook is like willingly signing your own death warrant.
  • Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
  • If money grew on trees, girls would be dating monkeys!
  • I am not born to please people, So if you want to get pleased try me in next life…good luck!
  • Girls spend the first 10 years of their lifes playing with barbies. The next 10 years of their lifes they try to look like one. (;
  • Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
  • Congratulations!! You are the 100th person to view my status. To see your prize please click Control + W.
  • I used to play sports alot. Until, recently I realized that trophies are much cheaper than I ever imagined they were. You know what, now I’m good at everything.
  • I could talk about myself for hours. But the second someone asks me to tell them a little bit about myself? I can’t even remember my name.
  • Mom always said not to write on walls…but apparently on Facebook you can.
  • Warning!!! Aliens are coming to abduct all the sexy, beautiful people!! Don’t worry…you are OK. I just wanted to say “good-bye!” 

Top 20 Best Facebook Status | Facebook | Whatsapp

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  1. I want an auctioneer to read my eulogy.
  2. When my hands are cold I warm them between my thighs. Are your ears cold?
  3. I wonder what its like to fart in zero gravity. Does it like...propel you forward? These are things people need to know NASA!
  4. If a man said he'll fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it
  5. Every few years I come to the realization that I was such an idiot just a few years ago.
  6. I want the job where you push scared skydivers out of planes.
  7. I believe in karma That means I can do bad things to people I don't like and assume they deserved it .
  8. Turn your wounds into wisdom.
  9. Here's an idea, how about everyone stfu and quit bitching about lame posts and just steal statuses like you're here for anyways. Better yet, come up with your own shit if it's such a big deal you uncreative douches. Now let the dislikes and vulgar comments begin.
  10. Somewhere in the world right now a honeybadger is sitting alone crying because no one believes that he DOES care.
  11. Life is only as great as the risks you're willing to take.
  12. I don't always post updates...but when I do, I prefer status stalker...stay lazy my friends.
  13. Many things give us joy in life, but not nearly as much joy as finding money in a parking lot.
  14. New Rule: If I hold the door open for you and you walk by without thanking me I am guaranteed at least one attempt at trying to trip you.
  15. Thank you for giving me pieces of your heart to fill in the breaks in mine.
  16. Leonardo DiCaprio never died in Titanic. Last scene: him going underwater. 1st Scene in Inception: him waking up on a beach.
  17. The happiness of your life...depends on the quality of your thoughts.
  18. So, to put a positive spin on Daylight Savings Time, instead of "losing an hour of sleep" on a Saturday...we should put our clocks ahead at 4pm on a Wednesday, it would be "leave work early day".
  19. I've always wanted to get into a cab and yell, 'Follow that car!!!'
  20. ALL relationships go through shit. REAL relationships get through shit


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Awesome Status for Facebook

Now you can update your Facebook Status according to your mood. If you are in fun loving or humorous mood and want to update your Facebook Status according to your present mood. Collection of all type funny Facebook status messages, COOL Facebook status ideas, Relationship status, best messages, sad whatsapp emoticon status etc.



  1. Love means exposing yourself to the pain of being hurt by someone you trust.
  2. Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell. ~ Anonymous
  3. It only hurts when you love someone and you know they don't love you back.
  4. Don't mind the weather, it's raining in my heart tonight
  5. I don't think we love each other in the same way. And...I think keeping you near me, would destroy me. ― S.C. Stephens, Thoughtless
  6. The shattering of a heart when being broken is the loudest quiet ever.
  7. LOVING MIGHT BE A MISTAKE, BUT IT'S WORTHS MAKING.!
  8. “Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.”
  9. Our marriage is like a workshop. I work and my wife shops.
  10. If someone you love hurts you cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it
  11. Going for Aerospace Engineering. Meri future GF ko bohat space milega
  12. You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture they hands you the camera.
  13. For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened.
  14. I knew, I was born to be a pessimist. Because My blood group type is B Negative
  15. If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong
  16. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
  17. “You don’t know anything about pain until you’ve seen your own baby drowned in a tub… and you definitely don’t know anything about how to wash a baby.” – Anthony Jeselnik
  18. Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software...it's called #Monday, please fix it
  19. When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start looking like nails
  20. My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.
  21. The “Night Out” ever…… but I don’t know why they took me to police station. Am I Famous??
  22. One day I am gonna win….. I can wait till mah death for it.
  23. If you’re talking abt me behind mah back….. go ahead this is the best angel to kiss mah ass!
  24. Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal my status :P 
  25. Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love. - Albert Einstein
  26. “And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars.”–Across the Universe by Beth Revis
  27. Falling in love is only half of what I want. Staying in love with you till forever is the other.
  28. Two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one. ~John Keats
  29. "I know he's a player, but I want to be the girl that he hangs up his jersey for and leaves the game”
  30. "Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."
  31. 'Women are cursed, and men are the proof.' -Rosanne Barr
  32. ”We see all beautiful and colorful things in dis world from our BLACK n WHITE eyes!”

Very Funny Statuses for Facebook

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Whether you're trying to find that ridiculous facebook status that'll get hundreds of likes or an unforgettable method to proclaim your appreciate to that somebody special. You've found the best site! We have thousands of the cool, best, witty, humorous, crazy, relationship and just foolish facebook status when it comes to even more gathering daily.

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  • I want an auctioneer to read my eulogy.
  • When my hands are cold I warm them between my thighs. Are your ears cold?
  • I wonder what its like to fart in zero gravity. Does it like...propel you forward? These are things people need to know NASA!
  • If a man said he'll fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it
  • Every few years I come to the realization that I was such an idiot just a few years ago.
  • I want the job where you push scared skydivers out of planes.
  • I believe in karma That means I can do bad things to people I don't like and assume they deserved it .
  • Turn your wounds into wisdom.
  • Here's an idea, how about everyone stfu and quit bitching about lame posts and just steal statuses like you're here for anyways. Better yet, come up with your own shit if it's such a big deal you uncreative douches. Now let the dislikes and vulgar comments begin.
  • Somewhere in the world right now a honeybadger is sitting alone crying because no one believes that he DOES care.
  • Life is only as great as the risks you're willing to take.
  • I don't always post updates...but when I do, I prefer status stalker...stay lazy my friends.
  • Many things give us joy in life, but not nearly as much joy as finding money in a parking lot.
  • New Rule: If I hold the door open for you and you walk by without thanking me I am guaranteed at least one attempt at trying to trip you.
  • Thank you for giving me pieces of your heart to fill in the breaks in mine.
  • Leonardo DiCaprio never died in Titanic. Last scene: him going underwater. 1st Scene in Inception: him waking up on a beach.
  • The happiness of your life...depends on the quality of your thoughts.
  • So, to put a positive spin on Daylight Savings Time, instead of "losing an hour of sleep" on a Saturday...we should put our clocks ahead at 4pm on a Wednesday, it would be "leave work early day".
  • I've always wanted to get into a cab and yell, 'Follow that car!!!'
  • ALL relationships go through shit. REAL relationships get through shit

Top Hilarious Statuses for Facebook

These days, hundreds of millions of people use Facebook to interact socially with their buddies. In reality, almost 300,000 status updates are uploaded to Facebook every minute. Facebook is a fantastic area to sign in to view what crucial things folks are doing and also thought and feelings individuals are believing.  When you go on Facebook, a little box hangs there, asking you, "Exactly what's on your mind?" Your solution to that inquiry will certainly show up in the news feed of every active Facebook buddy. Just what is on your thoughts? Now is your possibility to say something fascinating.  we have lots of status for facebook like Hilariour Facebook status, Best Facebook Status, Cool Facebook Status, Facebook Relationship Status, Hindi Facebook Status, funny status for facebook.

Obviously, locating words for your solution to this concerns is tougher than it looks. If your brain were a fishbowl, you could just stick your hand in there as well as take out a huge thought, right? But although Facebook makes it appears so, minds are not fishbowls, and also if you are feeling stuck, continue reading for inspiration on life: sessions, quotes, knowledge, phrases, as well as more.
Funny_hilarious_baby

  • To find your prince you need to kiss a few frogs not sleep with the whole pond.
  • Isn't it weird that after 30,000 years of eating bread, everyone is gluten allergic now?
  • Ways to tell a woman is mad at you: 1. She is silent. 2. She is yelling. 3. She acts different. 4. She acts the same. 5. She kills you.
  • Everything I like is expensive, illegal, or won't text me back.
  • Life is so hard when you have twenty TV shows to watch.
  •  Sorry I'm poor I can't afford to pay attention.
  • If you say you can't cook what your really saying is that you can't read and follow directions.
  • You have 600 friends on Facebook but you have to take your own picture of yourself for your profile photo.
  • I love those moments where no words are said, but you just start laughing with someone.
  • Nothing like my bank account to kill any feelings of spontaneity.
  • No one wants to hear about your diet. Just eat your salad and be sad.
  • I usually base my religious and political beliefs on flyers and pamphlets handed to me on the street.
  • I'm trying to kick dairy and now I've got the milk shakes.
  • Pocketwatches were replaced by wristwatches, which became digitalwatches, which were replaced by mobile phones. Which we keep in our pockets.
  • You can stop trying to drive me crazy. I'm honestly close enough to walk to it from here.
  • The year is 2089. Toasters are made clear now and no one burns toast or bagels. Crime is at 0%
  • Calm the eff down, different flavored Oreo s. Nobody wants to make that kind of decision. Regular or Double stuff was hard enough.
  • I act like Pacman at parties. I walk around the room eating everything in site and avoiding everyone.
  • I'm starting to think we as a society may be trying to do too much with the Dorito.


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Hilarious Status for Facebook

You can share your feelings whats on your mind today facebook is social networking site to connect friends family and people each other and provide services. you can also share your status on your facebook wall. if you have no more status for your facebook status wall don't worry we have lot's of hilarious status for facebook.

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  • Do not talk if you have not good thing to share.

    • Your eyes explain your attitude.
    • Life is like??????
    • I am not failed in this work my success is just postponed.
    • When nothing goes to right in your life so don't worry go left.
    • 85% boys have girlfriend 15% are having brain who don't have girlfriend.
    • one thing can change women's mind discount.



    We have lot's of Facebook status like Best Facebook Status Cool Facebook Status, Hilarious Facebook Status, Funny Facebook Status, Facebook Status in Punjabi. These Facebook status are unique and Created by admin of this site.